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Session 5: How To Gain Confidence

Confidence is what fuels the business fire. Anyone can obtain the tactics to set up a business, but it takes a confident leader to grow a business and not fall apart in times of adversity. But what we often question is whether we need to already have confidence going in and starting the entrepreneurial journey, or is it something we gain along the way.

 
 

While we all want it, confidence is not innate and is a skill that must be developed. I’m calling it a skill because you have to work for it to become confident. Just as you develop muscle mass by repetitive action, you must develop your confidence the same way by doing what you are scared of over and over. For this reason, you can’t wait to start chasing your dreams until you feel confident. Start chasing first and confidence will continue to build.

1. Push yourself to do it anyway

Repetitive action is key. The first time you speak in front of a crowd your heart starts pounding, palms are sweaty, and you may even be physically shaking. The more you push yourself to get uncomfortable and do it again, the symptoms become less each time. The same is true with everything you do as an entrepreneur. It is scary and won’t feel comfortable at times, but continue to put one foot in front of the other. Do what scares you most over and over, and over time, it will become routine.

 

2. Silence the negative voice in your head

As entrepreneurs, our biggest fear is not being liked or approved of. We fear making a mistake or being judged. The more you silence this voice, the more you can develop your skill of confidence. The truth is that there will always be someone that doesn’t like something you do and that is OK. In fact, the more confident you become and the more real and authentic your voice is, the more likely you are to encounter a hater. In other words, if you receive that negative feedback, know that it just means you are impacting people in a big way.

 

3. Put your attention on the message

Instead of putting all the pressure on yourself, think about how what you're trying to do will support other people. Ask yourself: what is the message I am giving and who is this going to help? 

Often our confidence is stripped when we make it too much about ourselves, and we are afraid of saying or doing the wrong thing. Understand that no path is wrong and always teaches you something. Quitting is the only way you will fail.

 

4. Have people around you who support you and push you forward

No one can be positive and reassuring for themselves 100% of the time. Sometimes we are scared of what having confidence will actually bring us. Will we get too much responsibility? Can we handle it? Make sure to surround yourself with people who will encourage you that you can do anything. Fear that you aren’t enough or aren’t deserving can stop you from progressing forward.

 

5. Find your fuel based on past successful experiences

In Session 2, we talked about finding your fuel based on past successful experiences and overcoming your weaknesses. You have overcome previous struggles to get to where you are currently at, so the future will be the same. With each struggle or weakness, new tools are learned and confidence is gained.


ACTIVITY

1. Ask at least 10 people to describe you with 3 adjectives.

Facebook is a great way to achieve this through a single post, and you will probably help you get more than 10 people to comment. Did you expect to see these adjectives?

 

2. What 3 adjectives would you use to describe yourself, and how do they propel you forward in your successes?